Sometimes I wish i could go back in the fog. I was less angry.
Sunday, July 1, 2012
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A Place for me to talk about things that happen to me. Also, a place to express myself.
Sometimes I wish i could go back in the fog. I was less angry.
Posted by Renee at 3:47 PM
3 comments:
I hear ya, in a way. Though I guess I'm the opposite. When I used to go to therapy and she'd ask me how I felt I only ever had three answers: angry, sad or blank. She said "I think you'll find out you have a rich emotional landscape." Not only she was wrong, but not I'm not even angry. When I think about it, it comes out in my head as "empty, sad or blank." It was better when I had anger.
I suppose that actually has nothing at all to do with what you're saying, come to think of it.
Well, oh well. I'm glad you're back anyway. I missed you.
I know EXACTLY how you are feeling. So many times I have thought how I wished I never stepped out of the fog. I am pretty sure friends and family have tried to tell me the same, in their own way. In the fog I was numb, in complete denial, pushing all those emotions away deep DEEEP inside. Once out of the fog they come spewing out in every direction at any moment and it seems anything can trigger it. A lifetime (or thereabouts) of the fog then suddenly stepping out of it will do that to you. It is exhausting...but I hope (and believe) worth it.
I wish I had feelings. I am numb most of the time- and then a mess at the same time of emotions... makes no sense. I am dull. Flat affect maybe?
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